Purity

Diamonds and coal , what a contradiction , but they are both made of the same one element that occupies the 6th place in the periodic table , its considered to be one of the most abundant element in the whole universe , Carbon it is . However , it is all due to simple laws of physics that make the huge difference between the two compounds , and it is why one is priceless and the other is worthless , it is why we like to posses one and repel the other , its why we cherish the sparkling of one and depreciate the incineration of the other . Thus , no one consider himself unlucky for having a diamond , and no one consider himself lucky for having a piece of charcoal .

This contradiction exists in the same manner between humans . Just by looking around , you will find yourself surrounded by lots of people , most of them doesn’t deserve any time to be wasted on , but few – and only few - are precious and worth fighting for , those are the diamonds we should be searching & treasuring !

Despite my lust and crave for diamonds , I have reached a phase where I couldn’t care less for collecting more to add to my treasure box , although I have not so many . In one stage of life , it starts to get difficult to make new friends , at which we have a list of different concerns and interests in which bothering to establish new friendships is not listed ! Whether it was fate or luck , no matter which , some times we are blessed with diamonds that fall from the sky just right into our treasure box , thats for which we should be thankful and grateful !

Some people are real diamonds ! They are pure & sparkling ; spreading their charm everywhere , adding new meanings of joy , changing the definition of tedious moments , coloring the smiles on our faces , shining with their brightness our path , & planting hope into our souls .
Feeling lucky for having a pure diamond added to my collection !

Inspired by T.Z.

The Spark

Can we blame the person who lit the spark !
Everyone has his own problems that keep him awake all night thinking , and keep him away from functioning properly with others .

But if we just rewind the whole scenario of events that led to this shity situation , usually we find a very tiny small thing that if was avoided from the very first beginning could have saved us excessive neuronal firing in our limbic system !

However ; once we get there , we will either start bewailing & regretting fate that opened the door for that offender to sneak into our lives , or we will start condoling and convincing ourselves that it wasn't worth all the mess from the start .

That trivial event represents a spark , which is all what is needed for a chain of reactions to take place leading to a major life event .

But logically speaking , we might start wondering if we are justified to put all of our rage and blame that event ! Is it really the spark ? Or maybe its just fate that created & provided all the needed surrounding factors and arranged it perfectly to be there in the same time and exact place for a certain thing to happen ! Or is it us , who decide to respond in a way and behave in such a manner that contributes to the final event .

Well , what I am really sure of is that sometimes we are forced to get into a train , where we can't stop or get off until it reaches its final station . In such scenarios we don’t have much to do or say , and its going to be totally foolish to blame the person who built the railroad , but the person who pushed you to get in ...... Mmmmm , maybe you want to reconsider the whole thing from there !

People = Shit

The new series
Coming soon

Anesthetics

In medicine we learned to treat causes not symptoms , and this what makes the difference between a good & a bad doctor , but sometimes we are impelled to deal with the symptoms first , either to gain more time with a nagging patient till we reach a diagnosis , or to relieve the patient’s annoying complain which in the first place is part of the management!

But what would incompetent doctors do , is starting to treat the symptoms without trying to relate them to a cause that would provide a good explanation for what is going around ; in order to target the management toward the underlying cause!

Sometimes in real life we - ourselves - are incompetent doctors ! Bing a human being living on earth , you will be having an extreme continuous susceptibility to find yourself in the middle of trouble . And by our nature , an urge to dismiss yourself from such situations rises , to reach a stress-free life.

Our ways to attain this goal differ according to the situation ,the size of the problem , & our competency . Some would be targeted directly against the cause , which would terminate the whole process forever , others are considered to be half solutions . Some other trials are not even solutions , they are just some ....... anesthetics ! Anesthetics that are used to numb our feelings , and as soon as its duration of action falls , you will start complaining and feeling the pain once more again , because you had never reached the cause of pain.

In life we always do that , we always lean on people who could get us joy , maybe by them just being around , and we do that to escape our fears , to detour away from our problems …….. or maybe to numb our feelings.

But the biggest disappointment & the time when it hurts the most , is the time when you reach to your anesthetics and you find NONE.

Coldness

Either a 100% or its a Failure

Inspired by the Fun Day at the SOS yesterday

I know myself to be hardly satisfied and pleased in so many ways , and I have this general rule to judge myself , before applying it to people . Actually I don't care much about judging people , and if I do so , I like my opinion to be heard and listened to , and to be recognized as an advice not as criticism to point out someone's mistakes and thats it !

Back to the rule , it says " Its either a 100% success or its a failure " Well , I know perfection is impossible here on earth , so I ll be ok with a 90% .

Its difficult to have a single scale to measure success with , since everyone would have his own definition ; for me I like to be harsh on myself and take the bumpy way in judging my work , behavior , attitude , & personality . I like my work to be mistake-free , although it is some how impossible ! And it is like never going to happen , since I am too human .

Anyways , to be honest with you , I get annoyed and stung deep in the heart when someone starts pointing out my mistakes , not that I take things personally , but because I missed again , I screwed up again , or lets say I FAILED again . A mistake making more than 10% for me is a TOTAL FAILURE .

Despite the hassle and the bothersome feeling I ll be in , I get excited , agitated , and even turned on to listen to my mistakes and to know where did I screw up . And to the records , I consider this to be my best part , because I believe its the key for perfection . The reason for that , that I start looking to the future , imagining myself in the same situation again , trying to come up with ideas to avoid doing these mistakes again , to reach perfection / success , and live happily ever after , H3 !

Echo

I could save myself lots of trouble , if I could just listen to myself !

The problem is that you could have the ability to give advices , look at things from different angles , and offer lots of help to others ; but when it comes to yourself , your situation & problems , you stand there incapable of giving yourself the right advice , or even you cant think about he whole issue in a proper way ! Still , the worst happens when you cant just REPEAT what you used to say to others !

The Pioneer

Last Sunday , at around 6:00 PM , was declared the first day of a new era for the Naji's , the beginning of a new generation started when my brother - and all of us - were blessed with a cute little angel .

Iman the pioneer , the name that she will be called for the rest of her life !
Allah ye7meeha ya rab o ybarek feeha :)

With No Respect

Recently , doctors demand patients who seek medical help to show some respect ! But the big contrary is to ask people to show some respect when your " administrators " show nothing but contempt & discourtesy !

Standing behind the " triage " counter talking to a patient , I was hearing someone screaming somewhere among the people standing around , I really didn't bother , because i was already swamped ! I went to examine a patient , when the mad guy stood in front of me and started screaming

Mad guy : Who is in charge here
Cool guy (ME) : Dr Iman is
Mad guy : where is she ?
Cool guy (ME again) : she have just gone out , what is your problem ?
Mad guy : This patient went in and out and no body saw her !!! ...... And who are you ?
Cool guy (ME) : I am dr Dar , an intern
Mad guy " Be kol waq7a " in a way full of arrogance , he hold my badge to look at it , " o raja3ha be tareeqa awqa7 " and return it back in way full of disgust !
Cool guy (Me en7arag rasi ) : I stood for a moment then said in angry tone , where is the patient
Patient : Yes , thats me
Cool guy (acting pissed) : Did you enter this room before ??
Patient : No we didn't
Crowd (looking at the Mad guy)
Cool guy : OK ! Go there and have a seat and I ll check on you in a moment
Cool guy (turning to the Mad guy) : And who are you ?
Mad guy (lifting his badge up quickly giving me no chance to see it) : I am like you , a member in this Hospital
Cool guy (in a challenging tone) : Well you don't have the right to scream in front of patient , and you don't even have the right TO TOUCH MY BADGE !

To be continued ..............

After he got out , the head of the emergency department dropped by to see what happened ! After we talked , I told him " whoever that guy was , I wont care , no one have the right to do what he did "

By the way , that guy turned out to be something in the administration office !

HOW DEPRESSING !!!

It used to be a long way

On the way back from uni , it has been a long GOOD time

Soon we will strike for good

Standing at the nurse station doing some paper work , when a middle-age lady approached me and asked
She : Is doctor batee5 here ?
I : No he is not here !
She : Tab where is he
I : I don't know check for him at the residents room
She : ~ in an angry tone ~ Ma hala2 kont honak bedi adalni ray7a jai ana " I have just been there , I don't want to keep going back an forth "

What the hell !

I have spent 7 years having my ass kicked every day , having my sympathetic system to be exploited , abandoning lots of the things I used to do , doing paper work & being underpaid not to have some mad lady screaming at me just for nothing !

Why in hell should I , or anyone else on earth , know where the hell is doctor batee5 !

You might say , its lack of proper behavior & etiquette-ignorance people are living here , but please allow me to stop you there and scream in your face , NO IT IS NOT !

Its the mentality people started to embrace , once entering Prince Hamzeh Hospital . Its what the media tried to infest people's mind with . Its the chaos , the government , parliament & judicial system are allowing to happen !

This will soon be the state of all governmental hospitals , which for sure will be striking the private sector one day too .

Doctors & nurses in PHH are working under lots of stress now , they are really being afraid of getting in touch with any patient ....... Fear is good , we all know that , but trust me , not here ! Everyone is trying to get rid of his responsibilities by throwing it on another person once there is a chance to do so ! And that will do the patients no good ! But for sure it will save the doctors from being sued and thrown in jail - for about a month till now - for no real reason !

I am not saying not to penalize those who make mistakes , and slacke it at work , but that should be done in an organized way , there should be a complete view for the whole system from A to Z , starting from the Ministry of Health and ending with the patients !

Springle Mingle

A Simple Case of Deadness

Regarding the Hafnawi / Hefnawi / حفناوي case , seriously , I don't know what is happening here in Jordan , but unless there has been something still mysterious and hasn't been revealed yet , the whole story should ended long time ago !

Well , I have been personally interested in what happened recently at the emergency room of Prince Hamzeh Hospital " PHH " a couple of weeks ago . I tried to ask people who witnessed the whole event , and this is what I say when being asked about this whole story .......

Before the end of shift A at the emergency room , an old guy was brought in by the paramedics - Al Defa3 Al Madani - to the ER after falling down while he was walking on the streets and put on a bed , the doctor tried to get some information from him , but apparently the patient was disoriented , he took his phone and called his daughter to tell her that her father was found on ground and brought to PHH . The doctor asked for a skull X-ray , as any other doctor would deal with similar patients . The doctor carried on to examine the other patients at the ER . After a while , when he returned to check on Mr Hifnawi , he wasn't there !

At the ER of PHH there is 3-4 workers , who stay there to take patients who are critically ill whether on a wheel chair or by moving the whole bed to other departments according to what their conditions require !

Now , maybe at that time those workers were all away , so the patient was asked to wait , or the patient managed to get up and go to the radiology department by his own !

On the arrival of the patient's family , they were told that their father had been asked for an X-ray and didn't came back , before completing the management procedure , they and the doctor himself tried to look around the ER for the patient but they found nothing !

After 2 days the patient was found in the ER's radiology department dead !

According to a witness who saw the patient at the time of opening the room , the patient was found at the END of the ER's radiology department , behind a counter , with only his head being visible and a pool of blood beneath it , emphasizing that the X-ray request form was folded and found in his pocket !

This radiology department at the ER , has been never used before , it has been always closed , but at that day it was open for maintenance !

IN MY OPINION , and with all respect for the patient -peace be upon him - and the patient's family , this is a simple case of deadness , a guy who died on his way back from somewhere to somewhere else ! I don't think it would make any difference if he was on his way back from school to home or from the ER to the radiology department ............... Or how about to say , a patient who signed a discharge note on his own responsibility , or maybe a patient who went out of the hospital without telling his doctors and their approval .

In a situation like that in PHH which is dictated upon by the Ministry of Health , a doctor at the ER is not impelled to get patients to the radiology department or the lab , theoretically that is impossible !

Follows later ....

What is the truth behind this door

The emergency radiology department door at Prince Hamzeh Hospital .
During my day at the hospital I pass there lots of times , but I never noticed it was there !

How did an old guy - Hafnawi / Hefnawi / حفناوي - get in there ?

What do you feel ?